I stated that I planned to act physically well until something that can actually be identified and taken care of shows itself and that is what I have done since I wrote that post. I did start taking wal-mart's claritin and using my nebulizer regularly. Do I feel much better? A little here and a little there! I think the key is acting as if I am well. Faking it till I make it came in handy as a survival skill over the years. It is now a valuable tool to use when my attitude or my belief system is not secure. If I know what secure looks like then I will just fake it until I make it. This would be delusional were it not for the fact that I continue to strive towards the "making it" part of the statement. Without that I am just a "poser". Posers are boring, insecure and difficult to like. I don't wanna be a poser! The plan is to live my life without searching endlessly for the one diagnosis that is going to cure chronic illness. I have stopped. Finished! I remind myself that God will reveal whatever I need to see. Until then there is nothing for me to see. I'm making myself dizzy with repetition. I write as if anyone reading this post is too dumb to get the point! It is the opposite. I am too dumb to know when the point is made. My apologies to whomever...whenever.
Easter? Wow! We had it all in our family. Illness, drama, crying, love, great food, church, egg hunts and an unexpected guest. My buddy, the fellow I wrote about on another post, went to church and ate lunch with us. It was sublime having family and a visitor. My friend's name is Dean. He and I took out the Atlas and found a magnifying glass. We looked for the town in Missouri where he will soon be moving. It is right on the Mississippi River. Can't stop myself...M I crooked letter crooked letter I crooked letter crooked letter I humpback humpback I...Mississippi! Phew! Feels better now that is out of my system. We talked of snow, ice fishing, ways to earn pocketmoney doing errands for the new friends he will meet. Dean fell right in with our family. Lunch was a family meal with all the bumping into each other in the kitchen, "where is my fork", "what's to drink", "man, this food is great" one could ever want to here going on. No fussing. No hurt feelings. The fuse is always there and the match is always ready to be lit so no fussing is a miracle Easter. In our family having a chip on your shoulder is an art form during holiday seasons. Today was blessed. Today was lovely at lunch and at church and later walking four dogs round the park so they could stretch their legs a bit. There was a pre-teen riding circles around me on her bike. I threaten to smack her with the pooper scooper. A shallow threat given that I am walking and she is riding. Did I say that I saw Mr. Owl on the water tower night before last!! I did see him. He portends good things for me. Christ is risen! Our family worshipped and celebrated today. It really is true if I live in today without looking back or forward I can be pretty darn sure that my day is going to go well...even if it is going wrong. At midnight plus 1 minute I will be in another day with another chance. Christ is risen. Whom do I fear? It ain't about religion or formalities or much of anything other than the purity of a love that would die for me. For me?? If you knew me you would be a little skeptical of someone choosing to die for me. But Christ died for me and in a miraculous and unfathomable way rose from His grave and after a bit of running around on the earth and leaving the Holy Spirit as our own access to Him...Holy Spirit fully living in us Christ went to sit on the right hand of God the Father. Christ sitting on the right hand of God the Father interceding on our behalf. Great day! Beautiful day! The fruits of God's love for us displayed bountifully in my life today and my life ain't perfect. Nope! No way! I just got blessed real good today. Real good indeed!
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